Now I feel that I can really put into words the reasons why I don’t subscribe to this night-time baby training business – and here they are. Please don’t think that I am one of these mums who preaches from her pedestal having not experienced just how tough it can be – I know. I am not saying that we should all joyfully leap out of our beds a million times a night to tend to our babies, and I am all for gentle ways to encourage our babies to sleep better when they are physiologically and emotionally ready.What I am not, and never will be down with is the systematic and prolonged abandonment of children left to ‘teach themselves to sleep’.) This may get some peoples’ backs up but quite frankly, I’m not worried about that.
The rush of cortisol creates a fight-or-flight response in the body, putting the child under a lot of emotional and physical strain.
Our babies believe that we will be there for them unconditionally, so when we refuse to parent them in the same way at night as we do in the daytime – answering their cries, cuddling when they are sad, feeding them when they are hungry – they become confused.
I refuse to risk breaking that sacred bond of trust that is formed at birth.
A few minutes of fussing is completely different to prolonged, distressed screaming night after night from a confused, frightened and lonely child.
Babies don’t understand that mama is exhausted and needs sleep – all they understand are the overwhelming feelings of need; of emotional pain and longing.